Happy Holiday Chaos

Here it is December 6th and I still don't have my tree up yet! I have worked on getting the church decorated and it looks nice with alot of help from a friend! That is such a relief!

Tomorrow! I WILL get it done tomorrow! I am buying all new decorations this year. I saw this really pretty tree at the Christmas store that is decorated in lime (?) green and a deep red color with gold! It was beautiful ...so guess what my new colors are gonna be?? You guessed it! I am so excited. I looked at Hobby Lobby today to try to find some things in those colors but I couldn't find anything so it looks like I am gonna have to buy the stuff at the Christmas Store. Expensive, but I do have a gift certificate that I got for my birthday that will help $100 worth! Hopefully, I can get this all done tomorrow! Yea, for days off!

This month is insanely busy. Parties, parties, parties. Children's workers party, Pastor/Board party, staff party, WM's party...... We even decided to have an all church progressive dinner this year. Whose bright idea was this anyway?? I thought maybe we would have 30-45 people attend but we already have 85 people and still growing! OMG! Finding homes for this many people and arranging groups and food and everything else is out of control. We will need at least 8 homes and go in groups of 20. Wow! I hope I can get this together! Should be loads of fun and we will all end up back at the church for desserts and gift exchange. Fun times ahead!

Oh yeah and on top of everything else we have a wedding tomorrow night. Had rehearsal this evening.

Everything is hectic and happy with a little holiday stress thrown in! I love Christmas!

Hope every one out there is having a great time planning your holiday! Be blessed and ever thankful for His gift! It's the greatest of all!

Random Thoughts

Here it is nearly 1am. Today was a wild and crazy day and I should be exhausted but instead I am wide awake. The day started by being up and at church for the first service at 8:30 and it didn't stop until just a couple of hours ago. I pulled off a pretty big accomplishment tonight by giving a good friend a surprise (well, sort of) birthday party. Had a group of about 20 people here. It was alot of fun but exhausting.

I really need to go to sleep but I went to bed and laid their for an hour before getting up to blog. Just have too much on my mind. Tomorrow is going to be a stressful day at work and I am dreading it. Alot of "hard" stuff going on that can only be dealt with head on. ugh! hate that!

I wanted to get my Christmas tree up on Friday but instead I spent the afternoon hanging out with my hubby! What a treat!! We went to lunch and then to an early movie. Went to see August Rush! It was awesome and I totally recommend it to everyone!! If you like music at all you will be in awe and it you are sentimental it will bring tears to your eyes! The whole theatre broke out in applause at the end. It's one of the few movies that I think I could watch more than once....even more than twice.

This week I will try to get my tree up and also the tree at the church. Trust me, this is not my favorite thing to do.

Everyone is posting about their favorite memories or traditions of Christmas...Well, I must tell you that you will not want to sign up for OUR yearly tradition! We call it the "Annual Christmas Tree Fight". Mike will have nothing to do with putting the tree up. He leaves it all up to me and I get frustrated and angry from the lack of help or support! It has become the family joke...

One year while having trouble with the lights...I picked up the whole wade of lights that were strung out all over the floor and took them outside and threw them in the dumpster. Then I had to go out and buy all new lights. I always stew around and grumble cause I am not getting any help and it always turns into a big fight. You can mark it down, happens every year!! Maybe this year will be the year that I will accept that it is not my hubby's "cup of tea" and get it done without grumbling! haha! But then again, do I really want to break with tradition???

ABC's of Thanksgiving

It’s Thanksgiving! If I can’t find something to write about at this time of the year there is something surely wrong! So many blessings! My hubby preached a Thanksgiving message and in it he included his ABC’s of Thanksgiving. I was inspired to come home and write my own ABC’s. So here they are….not as funny as his were but, oh well…. You should try it …it’s a little harder than you would think!! I am thankful for all of you and these things too:

My ABC’s of Thanksgiving:

A - Amber, Addie and air conditioning
B - Brylea, my bed, The Bible and the Blood
C - Chad, my church, the call of God, Chik-fil-a and chocolate
D - Dining out, dollars, my dreams and David and DeLana
E - Energy, education and electricity
F - forgiveness, family, friends, freedom, the future and the favor of God
G - God’s grace, generous gifts and good times
H - Home, health, hugs and Hershey’s
I - independence, income, in-laws and ice cream
J - Jesus, justice and Joetta
K - Krista, kindness and kisses
L – love letters, liberty, laughter and Lisa
M - Marriage, Mike, Mom, movies, memories, missionaries, mentors
N – new clothes and non-fat Starbuck’s drinks
O - old friends, old comfy shoes
P - peace of mind, peace with God, pictures, pizza
Q - quietness, quality of life
R - Redemption, retreats, Rosa’s
S - Shawn, sunshine, sleep, Starbucks, shopping
T - time, tenderness and tears
U – understanding, unborn grandbabies!
V - Volunteers, vacation
W - warmth, worship, willing workers, way of escape!
X - all the X-tra blessings that God gives me every day!!
Y - YOU, yesterday and all the years ahead
Z – zillions of others things I can’t think of right now

Today

Today has been great for a couple of reasons!

• The group my daughter sings with has had their CD picked up by Family Bookstores nationwide and was featured in Family’s latest circular that just came out. They are called Frontline Worship and the name of the CD is “The Combination” . I went today and picked up a couple CD’s! It was so cool. I couldn’t help but tell the cashier that the girl on the front with the red belt was my daughter!! Haha! I know she was duly impressed! The CD is awesome and it is so exciting for them. They have worked so hard! They are going to be featured with a full page ad in the January circular. We are praying, praying, praying that their sales will be good and that Family Bookstores will continue in this partnership!! So go out today and buy your copy!! You will be blessed!
  


• Today is my birthday and I have been incredibly blessed by friends and family! I am so spoiled! My hubby did something amazing and bought me the most beautiful ring! I have never like my birth stone much. It is a topaz. But this ring is simply beautiful! It is a topaz with little chocolate diamonds all around it! Simply gorgeous! The church blessed me yesterday with a gift certificate to have a one hour massage therapy every month for the next year! Wow! That is great!
  
  I am blessed, blessed, blessed!

Trip to San Antonio

We are on a short trip to San Antonio. Chad, Amber and the girls are with us. The weather is absolutely gorgeous! I am still feeling slightly miserable with this throat and head thing but I am trying to not let it keep me down. The guys went to play golf and Amber and I went to a new outdoor mall and wandered around until the girls got tired and ready for a nap. Now I am resting here in the hotel! Wonderful and relaxing!

I was right about the girls singing “Annie” songs! They already know a lot of the lyrics and they went off to their room just now begging to watch Annie while they laid down to rest! Haha! Poor Chad! Maybe someday he will have a little boy and he can pull out the old “Karate Kid” movies that he use to watch repeatedly when he was a kid! He was so taken with Karate Kid that we had to put him in karate classes. It was great until he came home and tried out his kicks on his sister! One time he actually convinced her to hold perfectly still and he would kick as close to her face as he could without touching her. He declared that he “had control” and would not touch her! Well, you can guess what happened…..just one bloody nose and that trust was completely broken! She has never forgiven him for that one!

We’ll be home on Wednesday. Right now, just looking forward to this evening and tomorrow……in this beautiful place!

Oh For A Thousand Tongues To Sing

Well, for the past couple of days I have literally had NO voice. I try to talk but nothing comes out. It is so frustrating and exhausting. Every time I say something I have to repeat it because I can't be heard and that just adds to the frustration!

We had a wedding at our church today. It was an African wedding.....(Very interesting but that is a different story.....) They had praise and worship at this wedding! I did my best to sing but it was completely hopeless! Nothing would come out except little raspy squeaks! So I just listened and thought how glad I am that I am not without voice permanently! (Although, some may find my temporary silence quite nice!) It would be so terrible to never be able to sing again! Singing........

• It is my expression of praise when I am rejoicing!
• It is my expression of gratitude when I am thankful.
• It is my testimony of His faithfulness in my triumphs.
• It is my release from the spirit of heaviness!
• It is my entrance into the Holy of Holies.
• It is my worship and love to a worthy redeemer!
  

When I sing, it is all of this and so much more! Thank you God, for a voice to sing! If I had a thousand tongues - I would use them all to sing praises to you!

Well anyway, here's hoping that my voice will come back soon! I hate to miss singing tomorrow at church!

"Tomorrow, tomorrow I love ya, tomorrow.........

I got to keep my granddaughters last night while their mom and dad went to the football game.

I had bought them the old classic movie "Annie". I was not disappointed in their response! They were glued to the TV. This use to be my daughter's favorite movie when she was growing up. She and I could probably sing most of the songs on it from memory! I have been sick for the past couple of days and so I have NO voice! The girls just thought it was hilarious that I could only whisper! They kept saying "Sing it, gramma...We can't hear you!"

Brylea decided that she wants red hair and wants to sing like Annie. They loved it so much that they watched it twice and wanted to take it home with them. Of course, I let them.....Their daddy will be so excited! haha! (He use to get sick of it when his sister watched it all the time!) I guarentee you that next time I see them they will be singing those songs from memory themselves! "Tomorrow, tomorrow...I love ya tomorrow.....You're only a daaaay a....waaay!"

The youngest is so funny. She never stops for one moment but then all of a sudden she just passes out!! And then you cannot wake her no matter what! She finally passed out during the second veiwing!

It was a great evening! God certainly knew what he was doing when he came up with the idea of grandbabies!

The Name Game

Oh, the names he calls me
Behind my back, not face to face
He whispers loud enough to hear
“Unworthy” - “A Disgrace!”
He knows just when it hurts the most
That’s when he throws the stone
He loves to call me “Failure”
“Hopeless” and “Alone”
“Forgotten” and “Forsaken”
Echo in my ear
“Rejected” “Lost” and “Broken”
He calls me “Full of Fear”

“Defeated Foe”, “Under My Feet”
“The Father of all Lies”
“The Evil One” – “Impostor”
“Dark Angel of Disguise”
You know your days are numbered
Little time to do your deeds
So with deceitful lies you call your names
And plant your little seeds

But forget the rubble of my past!
Forget where all I’ve been!
For now I’ve met a Savior
Who loves to call me “Friend”
“Redeemed” “My Bride” and “Lovely”
He says it to my face!
I love it when He calls me
“A Sinner Saved By Grace”!
He loves to call me “Whole Again”
“The Righteousness of God”
Yes, now my name is “Chosen”
“Accepted” and “Beloved”

Who is this most treasured one
Who rescues me from death?
He is the great “Creator”
The one who gives me breath!
He’s my “Knight In Shining Armor”
The “Lover of My Soul”
The “Light of my Salvation”
And “Shepherd of the Fold”
I love to call him “Wonderful”
“Messiah” – “Great I Am”
“My Healer” – and “Provider”
“The Lion and The Lamb”
When I’m weak, I call him “Jesus”
That name most powerful
When I’m troubled he’s my “Prince of Peace”
Who calms the restless soul
When I’m dejected he’s the “Glory”
And “Lifter of My Head”
I remember he’s the “Truth” and “Way”
And look to Him instead.

So when Satan plays this name game
He comes off rather lame
I cannot loose! - The war’s been won!
“Defeated” is his name!

I've Been Tagged

I've been tagged by "rw" so here goes! (Of course, there is nothing weird, odd, strange about me....)

• After I shower in the mornings, I always put my makeup on before I fix my hair. I feel like my hair looks better if my make up is on. No, really!! I have better hair days when my makeup is on first!
  

• I cannot go into the kitchen and begin cooking if there are dishes in the sink. I must first make sure the kitchen is clean and every dish is put away before I can start. It use to make my husband and kids crazy if they were starving and I had to make sure everything was in place before I could begin cooking! Crazy, I know but a necessity!
  

• I have to sleep on the right side of the bed. I don’t sleep well if I am not on the right side! I need to be able to kick my right leg out of the covers in the middle of the night when I get one of those “flashes” !
  

• I completed a course to become a Medical Office Assistant and did 9 weeks of “on the job” training in a doctor’s office. I concluded that I did not have the stomach for this line of work about the third time the doctor had to say “Dawn, sit down and put your head between you knees!” Came close to passing out several times and have never pursued this profession since…
  

• Mike and I married so young (both 17) that we could not legally get married in the state of Oklahoma so we had to go to Kansas and get married in the morning and then came back for a mock wedding that night in Oklahoma with no one knowing that we were already married!
  

• I was determined to prove my husband wrong and signed up to give blood plasma just to make some extra Christmas money. Mike didn’t think I would do it. But when I got in there and was laying on the table, with the needle in my arm, I began getting really sick and passing out. They couldn’t get me to come to and were about to take me by ambulance to the hospital. They packed me in ice and kept slapping me in the face to wake me up! They literally had to stop in the middle of it all and put the blood/plasma back in!! To make matters worse – I was suppose to make $100 and they only paid my $17 because they had to stop in the middle of it all. I went through all of that for $17!!! I was very upset but when they asked me if I wanted to come back again later and try again I said definitely “No!”
  

• I love knowing what annoys people so that I can be annoying!! I can’t wait to see DeLana again so I can annoy her by slurping through a straw into an empty glass! Yep! Can't wait! Don't worry, I will stay out of "slap range".

I Am

Well, I am following suit. Several of you have posted your poems. I totally meant to have mine up before now but I am slow...so here it is.


I am diligent and determined.
I wonder at God’s ways.
I hear two contradicting voices... and try to listen to His.
I see good things ahead.
I want to have something to lay at His feet.
I am diligent and determined.

I pretend to not be shy.
I feel so young. How did I get this old?
I touch the lives of those God entrusts to me.
I worry over the lives I touch.
I cry when I am frustrated and tired.
I am diligent and determined.

I understand things are not always as they seem.
I say “It will be ok.”
I dream of rest with no pain.
I try to please everyone….
I hope to change my world.
I am diligent and determined.

I Know What Won't Work!

It's not fun...being discouraged and I rarely get that way. (thank God!) But today I am a bit discouraged....just in one area of my life.

There is one fight that I have been fighting for a long time. I have had a burden for this for years now and I have put alot of energy, emotion and time into it - but I'm getting nowhere and I'm tired.

I am being a bit vague here... but it's ok...just bear with me as I rant.

I have had a vision for this particular thing for so long! Strugggling to try to make a dream become a reality... But it hasnt' happened! In fact, I think things have gotten worse. How long before I can give up? I really want to give up on this one issue.

I've always heard that if you give something your all, be diligent and work hard - you will succeed. I'm not sure I believe that. Sometimes you work really hard and you still fail. And how long before you actually call it a failure? 2,3,4 years? Well, I'm there.

Failure. I hate the sound of that word! Sometimes we don't try, for fear of failure. But God, I tried and still failed. Now what? One thing about failure...it taught me what won't work.

I guess I'm suppose to regroup and start fighting from a different angle.

I really need some wisdom here! And some energy!

Now what?

One Day Down

It's almost over! The first day of my diet! I usually start a diet about every Monday. This time I am determined! I get this way every time I am nearing a birthday. It's like I think I cannot be "old" and "fat" at the same time.

Hmmm... this time I will succeed!

It's always the hardest in the evening. Maybe if I start going to bed about 7 pm......

It would be interesting to know how many pounds I have lost in my life. It would also be scary to know how much I would weigh if I hadn't lost them!

Well, one day of Lean Cuisine, 100 calorie snacks and tons of veggies down. Many more to go.

I think I can! I think I can! I think I can!

(My husband is eating chocolate chip cookies..ugh!)

Some More Daze of My Life

I haven't posted in a little over a week. Life has been busy....Went to a Minister's retreat the first of last week and it was really great to spend time with other preachers wives and especially my good friend, Lana. The last morning that I was there, the speaker spoke about the possibility - or even the probability of having a Judas in our life. It was an awesome message even though it left me with a bit of an unsettled feeling. Jesus had a Judas in his life and it was recorded for a purpose...maybe to show us the example of how to react when we are faced with that kind of betrayal. It must have hurt a lot - having someone who was so close to him, one of his inner circle of friends, to stab him in the back.

But on a lighter not, I am so thankful for the friends God has placed in my life. Most of them are truly amazing and I am a better person when with them. You know who you are!! Thanks!

I had a lot to catch up on when returning from the retreat....work, work, work....

On Friday I took the time to do some Christmas shopping! Yep! Really! Christmas shopping! Spent the whole day with a friend roaming the mall. It was wonderful! Haven't done that in so long. I'm getting a head start. But knowing me that means I will just keep shopping and spending right up till Christmas! (Maybe I should have waited and started on Christmas Eve! haha!) Then we met our husbands for dinner. I was totally exhausted when we got home around 10:30 pm. A great day!

Church was amazing yesterday! Awesome and powerful!! God is doing some remarkable things....had a couple of people commit their life to God and a host of people come forward for help with addictions, healing and needs met!

Our church is mothering another church where my son is the pastor and they had a great day yesterday also. 85 in attendance1 Not bad for a church that didn't even exist just a few months ago! They are excited and our whole church is pumped because we feel that we have had a part in the process!!

God's calling is so incredible and I am so amazed that He uses us to fulfill His will!

I am rambling today....but these are the daze of my life!

The Pumpkin Patch

Today Chad and Amber and the girls came over and we took a trip to the Pumpkin Patch. There were 100's of pumpkins of every size and shape. There were even some white pumpkins! I had never seen those before! The girls had so much fun wandering throught the patch, trying to pick the big ones up and playing in the hay. We took lots of pictures and bought some pumpkins to bring home. The girls ended up spending the night and we worked on those pumpkins all evening to make Jackie Lamps, as Addie calls them! It was my first attempt and I must say I didn't do so bad! We put candles in them and turned out the lights so we could see them. The girls loved it! It was a great day!

Gracefully? Never!

I went to take a friends nephew to the airport this week and because he was a minor I had to take him in and wait until the plane was in the air. On the way out I realized that I had been in such a hurry that I forgot to pay close attention to where I parked my car! It was horrible! I wandered through that airport parking lot for close to an hour. I couldn't even remember what level I parked on! I was near tears and about to give up while still wandering around muttering, "I am so old! I am so old." All I could think of was that my Grandmother use to loose her car........but she was OLD!! Ya know, they say we are suppose to "grow old gracefully". Well, not me! I plan to go kicking and screaming all the way! I wish we could grow old but never look old! Wouldn't that be great? I'm not sure at what age we would suddenly stop aging......maybe 25 ...or 30. I think 30 wouldn't be bad. I wouldn't mind looking the way I did at 30. (Just not the same hairdo! ha!) Oh well, I finally did find my car - just as I was about to try to find security to help me. I'm so glad I didn't have to do that! He probably would have thought I was just a silly "old" lady!

My Hairdos

Well, I went and got a much needed haircut today! Cut about 3 inches off. I was feeling pretty good about it all and bounced out of there to head home and drag out my blow dryer and curling iron to see what I could do with the new do!

I jumped in the car and deciding I needed another quick look, I threw down the visor and OMG!...What I saw was not at all the hair on my head but instead it was the hair GROWING right out of my chin! There is was shining right at me in the sunlight! I was mortified!! Suddnenly my new hair do was forgotten and I could only think of getting home to the tweezers! Now I know all you girls out there under 40 don't have a clue what I'm talking about but I promise your day is coming!!

When I got home and took care of both of my "hair does" I couldn't help but laugh in remembering that there use to be a lady in our church that we all wanted to chase down and tweeze..... The kids all exaggerated that she gave them whisker burn when she hugged them! Oh God, don't let me become Sister __________!!! haha!

I Want To Finish Strong

I want to finish strong.

I went to a funeral today. It was a man who use to know God in a very intimate and personal way. He raised his family in church and was a leader in the church. But something happened and about the time his kids were leaving home, he made a decision to walk away. Walk away from his wife, his home, his kids, his church and his God. It was a decision that hurt a lot of people. It has been years now. He has paid the ultimate consequence of his actions. Only fifty years old and his life is over. Yes, he turned to God in his death and yes, thankfully, we have a loving Father full of grace and mercy who lovingly welcomed him back home but I couldn't help but think as I left that funeral how sad that though he started out strong, his finish was weak. His testimony was marred. People were hurt. His latter life was a life of ruin.

I'll say it again.....I want to finish strong.....

Small Differences

Last weekend while going through Abilene on my way to the women's retreat, I stopped at the mall and did some shopping. I bought myself several tops that were on sale at Dillards and also bought my hubby 4 new shirts. I was very excited about my purchases and couldn't wait to get home to show Mike and let him try them on. haha! Here it is a week later and the bag is still laying on the floor in the closet waiting for someone to come along and take a peek. I have suggested at least 3-4 times that he needs to go try his new clothes on and he always says "Oh yeah, I will...I just keep forgetting"

On the other hand, I have already worn every new piece of clothing that I bought for myself. I would never leave new clothes just laying around in the shopping bag for a whole week! No way! I have been known to get out of bed at midnight to model something new!

It just occured to me that this is just another one of the small differences between my amazing man and me!

Of course if I had bought him some new golf balls, they would have already been used! Yep!

Quiet Place

There is a quiet place
Far from the rapid pace
Where God can soothe my troubled heart
There in that quiet hour
I sense God's might power
And all my fears just fade away
I feel his holy kiss
And know the loving bliss
Of a God who knows my name
Then when my time is spent
I leave with just a hint
Of His sweet aroma in my soul
And a longing that will stay
Until another day
Returning to that quiet place.

~Dawn Benson

Old Friends

I just recently got reconnected with a couple of friends from my past. One was a good friend in Jr. High and the other was a good friend in High School. Wow! If you know how old I am you would know that was a very long time ago! It was another life ago! How can it be that I can feel a strange connection with these friends that I haven't seen in many years? My life is nothing like it was back then......I feel like I'm a different person and I am sure that they are too. Friendship is something that I would never want to throw away but unfortunately it isn't hard to let it fade away from neglect and disconnection. Will I ever really build on those friendships from so long ago? I'm not sure....It remains to be seen ,but I will give it a shot. I am hoping to see both of them in the near future. We will talk, we will reminisce, and then we will see if our friendship is more than just a thing of the past. Very few are blessed with friends that remain friends for life. I would love to have that blessing!

Practicing His Presence

I love the presence of God. It seems easy to enter into His presence when I am at church and the worship leader ushers us all right into the Holy Place with wonderful praise and worship. It's a little harder on my own, when I am not surrounded by other believers. There are so many things to distract me.......so many thoughts invading my mind-space. At the retreat that I went to this past week-end, I really fought for God's presence. His presence is awesome and when I finally get there, I always find just what I need. When I need peace, He is my Jehovah Peace. When I need grace, He is my Jehovah Grace. When I need comfort, He is my Jehovah Comfort. Everything I need, He is to me. I need to learn to practice His presence more. Go there often. It's worth the fight.